


Disengaged

by CheekyBrunette



Category: Free!
Genre: Bullying, Depression, M/M, References to Homophobia, There's a lot that goes on in this, Verbal Abuse, also Rei and Nagisa switch pants on accident, makoto coddles nagisa shamelessly and Haru is just as guilty, makoto in glasses, verbally abusive parents
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-06
Updated: 2016-01-06
Packaged: 2018-05-12 03:44:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 20,025
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5651308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CheekyBrunette/pseuds/CheekyBrunette
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU in which it is government mandated that every Japanese citizen is engaged by the time they reach high school. Anyone without a match is paired up randomly. Unfortunately for Nagisa, he can’t find a fiancé in time and he ends up with social recluse: Ryugazaki Rei.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Disengaged

**Author's Note:**

> Just so you know going in, this is somewhat canon compliant, but a lot of things had to be changed to make this universe make sense. So I tried to mark milestones in the series, but I also tried to avoid being too repetitive. (Like, we all know what a struggle it was to get the swim club set up with the school's administration, we don't need to relive that battle in fic or otherwise.) 
> 
> Also Momo is a first year, Rin called when he came back from Australia, and most of this was written because RedJusticeLibra happened to comment on my last work "Makoto would be particularly helpless to the puppy eyes" and I couldn't have agreed more. 
> 
> Also see the end notes for links to some of my inspiration for this thing.

Nagisa couldn’t top shaking his leg on the train ride to school. His eyes flickered nervously between all the other kids in his car. Maybe he’d get lucky, and there’d be a pretty girl sitting alone in an Iwatobi uniform, desperate for a stranger to propose to her before school started.

After all, a proposal from someone you’d never met was better than having to get paired up with a stranger at the engagement ceremony. Nagisa couldn’t think of anything more humiliating than getting called up on that stage to be randomly assigned with someone. He hadn’t even met most of the kids at school yet, and they would already know how undesirable he was.

Or, okay, that wasn’t fair. Nagisa wasn’t the bottom of the barrel by any means. He was friendly and cute. Maybe he wasn’t exceptionally handsome and maybe he wasn’t smart, but Nagisa wouldn’t be a bad husband. He was only single because his friend group in middle school had been an odd number, and Nagisa had been the one left without a date. By the time he realized he didn’t have a match, everyone else in his grade had already paired up. Nagisa _could_ have had someone; he just wasn’t fast enough.

Nagisa started to fidget even more as the train neared his stop. He was going to end up with someone weird, or crazy, or gross. Only the ugly and awkward kids were left to be paired up randomly. They were the kids no one wanted; the kids everyone else refused to date.

And Nagisa was one of them.

* * *

 

Nagisa twisted around in his seat, searching the auditorium for two familiar faces. He looked up into the balcony where the second years were sitting. A wave of comfort washed over him when he saw Makoto waving and Haru looking down at him. Nagisa waved back.

At least he knew he had some friends to fall back on if this ended poorly.

Nagisa kept his eyes trained on Haru and Makoto until the school principal took the stage. “Welcome students and faculty!” the man boomed. Nagisa felt his chest tighten up. It was officially starting. “Today we are here to introduce our new students to Iwatobi as well as officially announce their engagements. These betrothed couples will get to experience high school as a team, thus eliminating the stress and anxiety students faced before the new system was put into place. By arranging marriages before the start of high school, students are ensured that they will never have to go through any problem alone, be it academic, social, or otherwise.”

The principal directed his attention towards the first years. “By being matched, you will always have a partner to lean on, someone to help you bear the load. You will be supported and cared for. By the end of three years, you’ll be ready to spend the rest of your lives together. We hope you look forward to your graduation, where you will officially be wed, pairing you together for the rest of your lives.”

Nagisa took a shaky breath. He wished the principal would stop talking. He already understood why being matched was a good thing in high school. After all, Nagisa had seen how well it worked for Haru and Makoto.

Haru was socially inept, and Makoto helped him to communicate with other people. Meanwhile, Makoto frequently became overly anxious and had panic attacks, and Haru was calm enough to help him relax. All they had to do was stand near each other to feel comfortable. They were so co-dependent, Nagisa doubted they could have made it through high school without each other.

But Haru and Makoto had been friends for years, and all of the matches seated around Nagisa had been together for just as long. Of course they would be able to help each other through school.

Whoever Nagisa ended up with would be a total stranger; they would have to spend their three years just getting to know each other. Nagisa was pretty sure that would only make him _more_ stressed and uncomfortable at Iwatobi. He wished the principal would stop talking about matches like they were always a perfect fit.

“Without further to do, let’s welcome our new couples to school. First up, Akiyama Hayato and Watanabe Michiko… Next, Aonuma Nori and Enomoto Miku…” The principal continued to list off couples, going in the alphabetical order of the boys’ last names.

The happy couples walked across the stage. Nagisa put his head between his legs. He felt like he was going to throw up.

The audience thinned out around him as all of the other first years stood on the risers behind the principal, hand and hand. Nagisa glanced up to see if there were any other students left in his section without a match. Tears welled up into his eyes when he realized that everyone seemed to have a partner.

“… And for the final couple, Yuuma Taiki and Tatsuno Megumi.” The principal paused for applause. “Now, there are a few students who have yet to find their match. Would the still single first years please stand up?”

Nagisa stood on shaky legs. He looked up towards the balcony, searching for his friends’ faces. He chewed on his bottom lip as his eyes locked with Haru’s first, then Makoto’s. A quick glance around the room made Nagisa’s stomach flip flop.

There was only one other person standing up.

The principal clapped his hands together, looking pleased. “Ah, perfect. There are only two of you. Come up on stage and announce your names to your peers.”

Nagisa would rather die, but there was no point in procrastinating. He made his way up to the stage, climbing the stairs after his partner. The principal passed him the microphone, and Nagisa took it hesitantly. It was heavy in his hands. Nagisa squeezed his eyes shut, tears threatening to roll down his cheeks at any moment. “Ha-Hazuki Nagisa,” he stammered. This was possibly the most humiliating moment of his life.

He passed the microphone to the other boy. Nagisa watched as he adjusted his glasses and kept his mouth shut.

“Go on, say your name. Introduce yourself,” the principal said kindly, egging the boy on, but the taller boy still didn’t say anything. Instead, his cheeks turned a bright shade of pink as he stared down at his toes.

“Excuse me, Koucho-sensei? His name is Rei, Ryugazaki Rei. And he’s really shy, so I don’t think he can talk in front of all these people,” piped up a girl from behind them.

Nagisa ran a hand through his hair, staring up at his new fiancé. So he was the shy, quiet type. That was the absolute opposite of Nagisa. There was no way this would work out, and Nagisa was going to be stuck with this kid for the rest of his life. He closed his eyes and took a shaky breath. He was two seconds from freaking out and either vomiting on the stage or bursting into tears.

“Okay, well. Ryugazaki Rei… Hazuki Nagisa… Meet your new match,” the principal said kindly. The auditorium clapped as Nagisa and Rei found their spot standing with everyone else on the risers. Nagisa tried to offer Rei a watery smile –one that said _we’ll get through this together_ \- but the other boy wouldn’t even look at him.

* * *

“It’s not so bad, Nagisa, there’s no need to cry,” Makoto said, placing a hand on Nagisa’s shoulder. They were sitting up on the roof. Apparently Haru and Makoto had lunch up here every day, so long as it wasn’t raining or too cold. Nagisa would usually enjoy the warm weather and the sun on his cheeks, but right now he was too upset.

“We were the only two,” he wept. “I thought there would be a couple of us without matches, but we were the only two.”

“Think of it this way,” Haru offered, disinterestedly picking at his rice with his chopsticks. “It’s a good thing that there were two of you, otherwise you’d be alone.”

Nagisa tensed. As bad as it was to have someone so mousy and shy for a partner, at least he _had_ someone. It would have been far worse to be alone. Nagisa was social by nature, and he needed a lot of attention to function. He couldn’t imagine what it would be like if he had to go through the rest of his life all by himself. He’d go crazy.

“Yeah. And you said you don’t mind him being a guy, right? And he’s a pretty cute one at that,” Makoto offered.

“He has a swimmers build,” Haru mused.

Nagisa scrubbed tears from his eyes. “I don’t think he’s a swimmer. I would have seen him at competitions before, or I would have… I would have heard of him at least. But I’ve _never_ heard the name Ryugazaki before, not even in passing.”

Makoto hummed. “Well, maybe he’ll be interested in it once you tell him about the new team we’re starting! Plenty of matches try to take up the same sport to spend more time together, and you and Rei need to be together as much you can so you’ll be ready for the marriage ceremony in three years.” He sounded so upbeat and positive that Nagisa couldn’t help but be swept up in it.

Maybe Makoto was right. Maybe Rei _would_ want to swim with him. They needed another person for the team, and it would give them a chance to get to know each other, like Makoto had said. Plus, Nagisa would love to be able to share his passion for swimming with his fiancé. One day, he and Rei would know each other inside and out, and it was important to Nagisa that Rei understood what it was like to swim together.

“Okay… I’ll ask him to join the swim club,” Nagisa said, trying to dry his eyes with the bottom hem of his sweater vest.

Haru nodded. “Good.”

“No, _great_ ,” Makoto corrected. “That’ll be _great_ , Nagisa. There’s no way he’ll say no to you. He probably has a crush on you already, yeah? You’re such a catch.”

Nagisa’s eyes widened as he realized what Makoto was trying to do. He was trying to reassure him, still, due to the ceremony that morning. Nagisa hugged his knees and hid his face in his trousers. “If I was a catch someone would have proposed to me,” he mumbled, discouraged.

Even if he had Rei, Nagisa still felt completely unwanted. There had been a sea of first years around him, and not one of them had asked to be Nagisa’s partner. He and Rei were the worst of the worst, the lowest of the low, and Nagisa had no idea how they would ever work things out.

* * *

Nagisa's eyes widened when he noticed Rei sitting across from him on the train.

He didn’t know why he was so surprised. Despite only meeting him this morning, Nagisa had seen Rei more times today than any of his friends. His fiancé was in all of his classes, apparently; it was only natural that he also took the same train home in the afternoon. The universe was clearly trying to wedge them together.

For some reason, Nagisa felt a wave of nervousness wash over him. Should he go say hello? They should probably start getting to know each other, right? He had told Makoto he would try to talk to Rei about swimming; maybe he could start with that.

But Rei didn’t look like he wanted to make conversation. His nose was buried in a book, and Nagisa didn’t want to break his concentration.

And what if Rei was only reading to avoid him? Maybe he had gotten on the train, saw Nagisa sitting there, and quickly pulled out his book to avoid eye contact. Maybe he was upset that he was matched with Nagisa. Maybe he thought Nagisa was loud and annoying, or maybe he didn’t like boys. Maybe both.

Nagisa wrung his hands together, not liking this nervous person he had become. He took a shaky breath.

They had to talk sometime, right? And now seemed like a good opportunity for it, so Nagisa plastered on the friendliest smile he could and seat-hopped to sit next to his new fiancé. “Hey, Rei-chan!” he greeted, trying to sound as cute as possible. Even if they were engaged, Nagisa still had to win Rei over. “I didn’t know you road this train home from school! You didn’t ride it this morning, did you?”

Rei didn’t smile. Rather, he adjusted his glasses and leaned a little further into his book.

Nagisa tried not to feel discouraged. Maybe Rei just didn’t realize someone had been speaking to him. Maybe he was so immersed in his reading that he had tuned everything out. Nagisa nudged his side. “Oi, Rei-chan! Let’s make friends, okay?” he asked. Rei still didn’t respond. “Hello? Rei-chan? Rei- _chaaaaan_. Rei-chan! Rei-chan, Rei-chan, Rei-chan, _Reeeeeeeeeei-chaaaaaa-_ ”

“Please don’t call me that,” Rei interrupted. Nagisa stopped making noise and twisted further in his seat towards Rei.

“Ah! Well at least now I know that you’re not deaf!” he chirped, filing away the information. He also took note of the fact that Rei seemed to give in quickly with whining. That would be useful in the future. “Tell me some other facts about you! Let’s start getting to know each other.”

Rei glanced at him for a moment. Nagisa took in the other boy’s purple eyes for the first time, and he felt something warm sweep through him. Rei really _was_ cute. Maybe Nagisa _could_ see them falling in love. Unfortunately, Rei turned away as fast as he had looked over. “That won’t be necessary,” Rei replied, returning to his book.

Nagisa made a choking noise, cheerful demeanor escaping him. “What do you mean?” he asked.

Rei huffed out an irritated sigh. “We don’t need to start ‘getting to know each other,’ as you put it. We’re going to get married no matter how familiar we are with each other, and it’s illogical to go out of our way to interact for the sake of friendship and romance.”

Nagisa floundered. “Um. Um… Um, what?” he stammered.

“Marriage is useful for financial purposes in the future, but I’m otherwise fine on my own,” Rei continued. He still hadn’t made eye contact, and it was making Nagisa feel incredibly uncomfortable. “I recommend that we both go our separate ways, Nagisa. We will live together like all married couples when we graduate, but other than that, there’s no point in disrupting our current lifestyles to be with each other.”

“Y-You don’t want to make friends?” Nagisa squeaked.

The train pulled to a stop. Rei tucked his novel into his backpack and stood up. “I’m sure you have plenty of friends,” he said as he threw on his backpack. “Go to them with your problems, not me.”

Rei stepped off the train, and Nagisa’s heart jammed itself up his throat. He sat motionless, frozen in shock as he processed how easily Rei had dismissed him. Eventually, Nagisa’s arms wrapped around his waist in a tight hug. He wondered what Makoto could possibly say to make this one better.

* * *

 

“Nagisa,” Haru chided. They were both sprawled out on Haru’s bed, waiting for Makoto to come over. They so close that Nagisa could feel the older boy’s breath on his temple.

“What?”

“Nothing,” Haru responded. Nagisa sat up on his elbow a bit, eyes widening. A wicked grin inched up his face, and he scooted closer to Haru’s side, hugging onto the upperclassman’s arm.

“Are you worried about me, Haru-chan?” he asked, already knowing the answer. Nagisa had been moping for about a week now, ever since Rei had told him that he didn’t want to talk to him. It was hard for most people to tell when Nagisa was upset –he hardly ever let his true emotions show, aside from bursting into tears after the engagement ceremony- but Haru and Makoto could both tell when something was off.

Before Haru could respond, the sound of the front door opening cut him off. “Hello? Haru?”

“We’re upstairs, Mako-chan!” Nagisa called. Haru just rolled his eyes. The sound of footsteps coming up the stairs echoed through the house, and Nagisa sat up and clapped when Makoto entered the room. “Hey, you’re here! Read Haru’s mind would you?”

“Eh? Oh, um…” Makoto blinked a few times, thrown by the direct order, but he quickly focused on searching Haru’s expressions for clues about how he might be feeling. Makoto placed a hand to his chin, humming. “Nagisa, you’ve been quieter than usual, haven’t you?”

Nagisa bit his bottom lip, sparing a glance towards Haru. “See? I knew you were worried,” he teased lightly.

Makoto sat on the foot of the bed. “Is it about Rei?”

Nagisa didn’t respond. He had already told Haru and Makoto about how Rei had blew him off on the train; it wasn’t worth rehashing. He didn’t want to bother them by moaning about the details.

“I think you should talk to him again,” Haru decided, sitting up next to Makoto. Nagisa tried not to get upset, watching his friends fit together like fiancés should. It was looking like Nagisa would never have that, at least not with Rei.

“That’s probably a bad idea. He seemed angry the last time I tried,” Nagisa said, sweeping his bangs off of his face. He kicked himself further away from his friends and pulled his knees to his chest. Despite Makoto and Haru already knowing something was wrong, he put on a fake smile. “But it’s okay, yeah? It would’ve been awkward, trying to hang out when we don’t know each other well, and I was really worried about it. But now we don’t have to do that. We can just… string each other along.”

“But the whole point of having a match is to have someone to count on, someone to support you,” Haru replied. Nagisa noticed the way his hand gripped at Makoto’s knee.

Makoto nodded. “Yeah, it’s not fair that he’s leaving you alone like this. Especially when-“

“Don’t talk about it,” Nagisa interrupted.

“Nagisa, it’s important to talk about your-“

“I said don’t _talk_ about it!” Nagisa yelped, his heart pounding furiously in his chest. If there was one thing he didn’t want to _think_ about, much less talk about, it was his parents. He didn’t know why Makoto was so insistent on bring them up all the time. “I have you guys to support me, right? And Gou seems nice. She’ll be a good friend too, once swim practice starts up.”

Makoto and Haru stayed quiet for a beat. Nagisa wrung his hands together.

“Nagisa, it’s important that you have someone who cares about you other than us,” Haru said.

Nagisa winced. “Well… I have all my friends from junior high,” he pointed out. “And I’m making new friends in my classes.” It was true. Most people liked Nagisa; he was so upbeat and sociable. But he hadn’t found anyone he felt like he belonged with outside of Haru and Makoto. After all, all the first years were too love sick to relate to anyone but their fiancés.

“What if we all talked to Rei together, huh? Maybe we could invite him to the swim club, and if he joins, you guys will make friends naturally,” Makoto offered.

Nagisa laughed. “Mako-chan, it sounds like you only care about me and Rei-chan because it might get us a fourth swimmer,” he tried to joke. Makoto smirked.

“Nagisa, you know that’s not true.”

Nagisa just hummed and flopped back on Haru’s bed. He was tired of talking about this; it was only making him feel more depressed than ever before. It was time for a subject change. “Okay, we can talk to him. But only once we’ve finished the pool, and until then, no more talking about Rei-chan, or being matched, or anything like that.”

Haru and Makoto shared a look.

“Deal.”

* * *

“Wow, Nagisa-kun, you’re a fast painter!” Gou said, wiping sweat from her brow and taking a sip of her water. It was starting to get warm outside, and the boys were in a time crunch to complete the pool so they could practice. Gou had even offered to help finish the painting so they could be done on time.

“Ah, thanks, Gou-chan!” he chirped. She narrowed her eyes at him, but didn’t bother to correct the pronunciation of her name. Nagisa was certain she hadn’t given up yet, but apparently she was letting it go for now.

“Makoto-senpai says you’re going to try to get Ryugazaki-kun to join the swim club,” she said, switching topics.

Nagisa tensed for a second but relaxed his shoulders before Gou could notice. “Oh, um… Yeah, we’ll see,” he chirped. He doubted Rei would ever agree to join the swim team based off of the one conversation they had, but he wanted to keep positive.

“Right!” Gou replied, sounding just as enthusiastic. However, her face fell after a moment. “It’s just… Well, Ryugazaki-kun and I went to the same middle school, and back then…” she trailed off and look up at the horizon. Her eyes seemed distant, and Nagisa wondered if she had forgotten that she was talking to him. “He never really talked to anyone. He was so quiet; the only time I ever heard him speak was to answer questions in class. I think he’s really shy.”

Nagisa scratched the back of his heck sheepishly. “Shy, huh? He seems more standoffish to me,” he replied with a wink.

Gou shrugged. “Maybe… But I also know that the kids in middle school didn’t treat him very well. There were a lot of bullies, and they were really mean, especially to students as smart as Ryugazaki-kun. I think anyone who was bullied like that would be a little wary of new people.”

Nagisa thought this over. “Yeah, you’re probably right!” he agreed with a smile, but inside his heart was racing. Maybe Rei hadn’t been very nice to him and maybe they didn’t know each other well, but he was still Nagisa’s fiancé. The last thing he wanted to hear was that Rei had been bullied in middle school.

* * *

Nagisa grabbed ahold of Makoto’s sleeve, feeling like a little kid. He had no idea why he was so scared of someone so quiet and nerdy. Rei was a person, just like him; he shouldn’t have to hide behind Makoto.

“Rei,” Haru deadpanned, forcing the underclassman to look up from his book. Nagisa shuffled further behind Makoto. He almost fell over as the train started up, but Makoto was sturdy enough to keep him upright.

Haru apparently didn’t have anything else to say, so Makoto took over. “I’m Makoto, and this is Haru. We came to talk to you about joining the swim club,” he said with a welcoming smile. He nudged Nagisa out from behind his shoulder. “Nagisa, Haru, and I just cleaned up the pool, and we start practice this week. We need four for a team, though, and we thought that your strong shoulders would make you a skilled swimmer!”

“Plus, we can get to know each other!” Nagisa added on, finding some confidence.

Rei’s eyebrows furrowed together. “Excuse me, Hazuki-kun, but I believe I made it quite clear when I said I was uninterested in becoming further acquainted,” he replied. Rei didn’t seem annoyed, so much as confused. That alone kept Nagisa from feeling completely discouraged.

“Right, but that’s kind of silly, don’t you think?” he said, eyes wide and unblinking.

Makoto nodded along with Nagisa, putting his hands on both of the blonde’s shoulders. “You two will have to learn to get along if you’re going to live together after high school. It is best to start making friends now.”

Rei seemed flustered. “I will require nothing from Hazuki-kun after high school aside from his half of our joint living costs. And besides, I don’t swim.”

“Fine, then we don’t want you anyway,” Haru said immediately. Nagisa could see the offense written in his features. Haru always seemed personally insulted when he met people who didn’t enjoy swimming. Fortunately, Makoto was quick to jump in and correct his partner.

“Now, now, Haru. Of course, we want Rei!”

“Right, we really, _really_ want Rei-chan,” Nagisa agreed, still staring at his fiancé. He kept his eyes as big as saucers. Already, Rei was beginning to squirm under his unending gaze. Rei glanced uncomfortably to the side as if he was weighing out his options. Nagisa tried not to feel too excited, but it looked as though Rei was about to agree.

“I don’t care,” Rei spat, and Nagisa felt his heart shatter. “I’m not joining the swim club.”

The train pulled to a stop, and Rei switched cars. Nagisa sat down shakily in Rei’s abandoned seat. He tried to ignore the way his stomach was tying itself in knots.

Makoto watched Rei walk away. “Don’t worry, Nagisa, we’ll get him. I promise.”

For the first time, Nagisa wasn’t sure if he could trust Makoto.

* * *

Nagisa glanced out the train window the next morning, only to see Rei running outside. He pressed his hands and cheek against the glass, making a squeaking noise that caused everyone on the train to look over at him. “Wow, he runs to school in the morning!” he yelped. An elderly man shushed him and Nagisa sat down properly in his seat, smiling all the while. Rei was definitely fit fit enough to be on the swim team, they just needed to somehow motivate him.

* * *

Nagisa decided to stop being scared of Rei. They had already started off on the wrong foot, there was no way pestering him into joining the swim team could make things worse. So every day before class, Nagisa would sit cross-legged on Rei’s desk and wait for him to come in. “Rei-chan! Ready to join the swim team yet?”

“No. Now get off of my desk!” Rei would snap, and Nagisa would slink away, feeling twice as annoying as he did the day before. However, he refused to stop asking. He and Rei would never get anywhere if they didn’t make friends, and the best way to do that was through swimming together.

After all, the reason Nagisa fit in so well with Makoto and Haru was because they had swam a relay together back in elementary school. And now that they got to swim together every day, they were only becoming closer.

Even if Nagisa had to ask a thousand times, he would make sure that Rei joined the swim team. It was their only hope at becoming a proper match.

* * *

“So, Rei-chan!” Nagisa exclaimed the second their class was dismissed. “Are you ready to join the swim team now? Huh? How about now?” He hovered over Rei as his classmate tried to pack up to go home for the day.

Rei seemed more tense than usual. “You’re driving me _crazy_ ,” he said through gritted teeth.

Nagisa laughed, trying not to let his embarrassment show. It was humiliating to be seen begging for Rei’s attention all of the time. All of his classmates were happily matched up; Nagisa was certain he was the only person in their grade whose fiancé actually _hated_ him. “You sound like my mom,” he giggled.

“Yeah, I bet I do,” Rei muttered under his breath. He angrily shoved a few pens into his bag before the strain in his shoulders lessened considerably. Nagisa tilted his head quizzically as he noticed Rei’s expression softening. “Look… If I join the swim club, will you stop harassing me before and after class?” Rei asked. All of a sudden, he looked positively exhausted, like he had just run a marathon or pulled an all-nighter.

“Rei-chan, I would do anything if you joined the swim club,” Nagisa promised, crossing his heart with a wink.

Rei ran a hand through his hair. If Nagisa didn’t know better, he would say Rei was actually considering his offer. “Okay… Okay, fine. You’ve worn me down. I’ll join,” he promised.

“Ah! Really?! You’ll join?!” Nagisa exclaimed, putting his hands down on Rei’s desk and leaning over him.

Rei flinched as Nagisa got a little too close. “That’s what I just said, isn’t it?” he asked, glaring up at Nagisa for a second. He slung his bag over his shoulder and stood up. “But I really don’t swim. Ever. So I’ll need a bathing suit and likely some instruction.”

“No problem!” Nagisa replied easily. Loaning Rei a swimsuit and teaching him the strokes would be a great way to start bonding. Even simply talking about proper swimming technique would be better conversation than what they currently said to each other. Maybe now Rei would actually listen to what Nagisa was saying, rather than just cast him aside. “Make sure you come tomorrow, then, okay? I’ll have everything ready.”

Rei stared at him for a moment. “Fine,” he eventually agreed.

Rei side stepped around Nagisa and left the room, presumably to catch his train. As soon as the classroom emptied out, Nagisa bounced around the desks, unable to contain his excitement. Maybe he had to beat Rei down to get his way, but at least he had won in the end. Nagisa ran all the way to practice to tell Haru, Makoto, and Gou the good news.

* * *

As it turned out, Rei was a terrible swimmer. He couldn’t do a single stroke without sinking to the bottom.

It was simultaneously encouraging and discouraging. One the one hand, Nagisa had no idea how Rei would ever be ready to swim in an actual competition. On the other hand, at least Nagisa could console himself with the fact that maybe Rei hadn’t avoided the swimming club just because he didn’t want to spend time with Nagisa. Maybe he was mostly just humiliated by his terrible swimming.

“Well, maybe we should start small,” Nagisa said with a wince after Rei sank to the bottom of the pool for the eighth time.

“I thought that’s what we _were_ doing,” Rei grumbled.

Nagisa couldn’t help but giggle at how ridiculous Rei looked with his goofy goggles and his crinkled little nose. “Geez, do you always have to be so cranky?” he asked with a smile. “The sun is shining, the birds are singing, you’re in a pool… Cheer up!”

Rei’s nose crinkled further. “I’m not always cranky,” he replied, seemingly offended.

Nagisa smirked. “You are when you’re around me.”

“That’s because you think it’s funny to back me into corners,” Rei pointed out. Nagisa’s smile fell a little. Okay, that was true. He did pester Rei a _lot_ , and he usually laughed whenever the other boy was clearly uncomfortable. Rei’s cheeks would get so hot and pink that Nagisa couldn’t keep himself from giggling.

If what Gou said about Rei getting bullied was true, Nagisa could understand why Rei might be upset with him.

“Let’s just blow some bubbles,” Nagisa decided. He waded further into the pool so his head just stuck out over the water. He beckoned Rei to join him. “Okay, so obviously, you don’t want to breathe in when your face is underwater, but you _do_ want to breath out. That way when you lift your head out of the water to take a breath, you have more time to inhale because you’ve already exhaled during your stroke.”

Explaining swimming was hard for Nagisa. He usually operated more on the _feeling_ of swimming, rather than the theory. Fortunately, Rei seemed to be following along. “Okay.”

Nagisa brightened. “Right, okay! So just… practice blowing bubbles through your nose, like this!” Nagisa bent his knees. Only his eyes stayed above the water as he exhaled through his nose. Bubbles quickly rose and broke apart on the surface.

Rei copied.

“Ah, perfect, Rei-chan!”

“Well, naturally, this is easy. It’s simple breathing technique, runners have to be just as mindful of their oxygen intake as swimmers do.”

“Oh, that’s right! You run to school every morning. Is that fun?” Nagisa asked, pushing his goggles up on the top of his head.

Rei didn’t respond, just blushed and looked down at his toes. Nagisa noticed that he did that a lot. He was always avoiding eye contact. It was unsettling for Nagisa, considering he thrived off of direct eye contact with other people. In elementary school, Haru and Rin used to complain about how often he stared at them and how little he blinked.

Nagisa put his hands on his hips, refusing to let Rei see how uncomfortable it made him. “Well,” he said cheerily, pushing the conversation and their swimming lesson along, “Since you did so well with blowing bubbles, let’s see if we can get you to float!”

* * *

“I had a great time getting to know you today, Rei,” Makoto said after practice ended. All four boys were in the locker room drying off. Rei very obviously hid his blush behind his towel as he dried his face. Nagisa smirked knowingly. Rei still seemed standoffish, but he could now see why everyone else commented on his shyness. Any time the attention turned to Rei, he was embarrassed.

“It’s good to have another person on the team,” Haru agreed. Of course, his comment probably had nothing to do with Rei. Haru hated talking to new people, but he loved swimming. He was probably only happy to have Rei because it meant the swim club could continue for another year.

Nagisa noticed the blush creep down Rei’s neck, and he took pity on the other boy. “You know, I think my reach is getting longer,” he piped up, taking the attention off of his fiancé. “It feels different when I swim. Like there’s a more definitive goal in mind.”

“That’s good, Nagisa! You usually do best at swimming when you’re motivated to win,” Makoto commented.

Nagisa grinned. “Yeah, unlike Haru-chan. The second he thinks about winning is the second he screws up.”

Haru cast Nagisa a withering glare. “Swimming isn’t about winning, it’s about-“

“Accepting the water, yeah, yeah. You say the same thing every day,” Nagisa laughed. He turned to Rei to see if he was at least entertained by their conversation, but the other boy just looked pale and awkward. Nagisa sighed. Breaking down Rei’s walls and becoming friends was going to be harder than he thought. “Rei-chan, let’s ride the train home together,” he said. Per usual, he couldn’t help but bounce from subject to subject, making their conversation confusing and untraceable.

Rei looked uncomfortable. “You promised that if I joined the swim team, you wouldn’t bother me during school anymore,” he replied.

Nagisa let out a sad, whining noise. “Yeah, but I’m talking about the _train_. That’s after school!” he pointed out. “Plus, I don’t bother you when I’m just talking. Do I?”

Rei was either too polite or too proud to voice his real thoughts.

“Come on, Rei-chan. One day we’ll be in the same house, maybe with the same bed! You’re going to have to get used to me always being around.” Nagisa carefully schooled his face into something along the lines of hopeful and determined, but inside he felt nothing but panic. Every time he thought about spending the rest of his life with Rei, he wanted to throw himself out a window.

Rei tensed up. “We won’t share a bed,” he snapped, eyeing Makoto and Haru nervously. It was as if he was scared they had overheard.

Nagisa tilted his head to the side, throwing Rei his best puppy dog eyes. “But can we ride the train together?”

“… Fine.”

“Yay!” Nagisa cheered, throwing on his sweater vest. He finished getting his clothes on and his gym bag packed away. In no time at all, he and Rei were on their way to the train. “Let’s sit here!” he chirped.

He sat down.

Rei sat with him.

Neither of them spoke.

Nagisa floundered for something interesting to say or a relevant conversation topic. Unfortunately, he didn’t know Rei well enough to know what subject would get him talking. Nagisa poked at his bottom lip as he tried to come up with something to talk about. “Oh! Rei-chan… Did you have fun today?”

Rei adjusted his glasses. “Not particularly.”

Nagisa deflated at his curt answer. He perked up, however, when he thought of another question to ask. “Well, did you feel like you learned a lot? You at least can float now, right? That’s something! You must feel like you’ve made progress!”

“I guess. I didn’t really want to learn how to swim in the first place.”

Nagisa felt considerably disheartened. Rei-chan didn’t care about _anything_ Nagisa cared about. He crossed his arms and pouted, resting his head on the window.

All of a sudden he felt really, _really_ tired. He had been up all night worrying about Rei, and how he would like swim club, and how he would like _Nagisa_ , and how their time together would go. Today had been better than he had expected, but Nagisa was still exhausted. He had swam extra hard to make up for the time he lost helping Rei learn how to swim. His brain was tired, and his body was tired, and soon Nagisa’s eyelids felt heavy.

He didn’t remember falling asleep, and he certainly didn’t remember resting his cheek on Rei’s shoulder. When he woke up, he was just… there. Rei stood up out from underneath him and didn’t make eye contact as he got off the train. Nagisa wiped drool off his cheek and wondered why Rei hadn’t shaken him off.

* * *

“I think he hates me, Rin-chan,” Nagisa said. His house was empty for once: no sisters home to tease him and no parents home to yell at him. The only sound was the _thump-thump_ of the bouncy ball Nagisa was throwing at the wall and bouncing off the floor.

Rin’s voice crackled out from his cell’s speakerphone. “Well… I don’t know if he _hates_ you, but he does seem _annoyed_ by you,” he replied.

Nagisa made a wailing noise. “Well don’t say that! You’re supposed to tell me that I’m great, and that there’s no way anyone could hate me, and that Rei just needs some more time to warm up to me. That kind of thing,” he demanded. If there was one thing Rin was, it was honest. He had come back from Australia jaded and angry. Nagisa didn’t know what had happened over there, but he wasn’t the same Rin he had been in elementary school. However, he did come back wiser and he gave great advice, even if he didn’t always say things Nagisa wanted to hear.

“Nagisa, if he’s half as quiet as you say he is, then you’re probably freaking him out with how _loud_ you are,” Rin replied. “You know, I consider you one of my closest friends-“

“Aw, Rin-chan, that’s so swee-“

“But even _I_ think your voice can be grating. For Christ’s sake you punctuate every sentence with an exclamation point,” Rin complained. “You shout everything you say; I bet Rei finds it overwhelming.”

“Rin-chan is _mean_ ,” Nagisa pouted. He was starting to wish he hadn’t called. Maybe Rin was right, but Nagisa wasn’t in the mood to have all of his insecurities actualized.

He must have sounded really upset because Rin’s voice was softer when he continued speaking. “Look, I’m not trying to insult you Nagisa. Yeah, you are a little loud, but it’s because you’re energetic and excited all of the time. Those are good things. Haru, Makoto, and I all _like_ those things about you. But maybe Rei needs some time to figure out how to deal with all of you because… because, well, you can be a handful,” he explained gently. Nagisa heard Rin snap his fingers over the line. “Remember when we met? When you were standing above my lane at the Iwatobi Swim Club? I was practicing, and you were watching?”

“Yeah,” Nagisa replied, determined to keep the tears out of his voice.

“Right, well, back then, I thought you were cute, but I didn’t think you were anything more than the kid-brother type. It took me awhile to get to know the real you, and when I did, I was happy that I had put in the effort to be friends with someone as determined and expressive as you.”

“RinRin, you’d better be careful, or I’m going to try to marry you instead of Rei-chan,” Nagisa teased. He wasn’t sure if what Rin was saying made him feel better or worse about himself. Honestly, he felt just as uncomfortable now as he did when he called Rin in the first place.

Rin screamed over the phone. “What?! No, stop, I’m engaged to Sousuke, and anyways, you’re to young! No! Just… Just give Rei some time, and I’m sure you’ll like him just fine. And he’ll like you. Just like that.”

“Just like that,” Nagisa parroted.

* * *

Conversation with Rei was just as difficult as ever. Every day, Nagisa would avoid Rei in school, and then try to talk to him at swim. Rei would be grumpy, and then they’d get changed, and then he’d still be grumpy, and then he’d walk to the train with Nagisa. Grumpy.

By the time they got on the train, Nagisa would give up on talking to Rei. All the other boy did was blush and look at the ground whenever Nagisa asked him questions. So instead of trying, Nagisa would let the rocking motion of the train send him to sleep.

His head would loll onto Rei’s shoulder. The other boy wouldn’t move until they reached his stop.

Nagisa had spent night after night, trying to figure out why Rei didn’t ever push him off. Every time he spoke to his partner, Rei made it clear that he wanted nothing to do with Nagisa. He hardly ever responded to Nagisa’s questions, and he certainly didn’t ask Nagisa any questions back. Yet every day, he let Nagisa drool on him as they road the train home together.

It didn’t make any sense.

Meanwhile, practice with Rei was going absolutely nowhere. Today was the eighth day Nagisa had spent trying to teach the other boy how to swim, and despite knowing how to float, knowing how to tread water, and knowing how to doggie paddle, he still couldn’t perform any of the official strokes without sinking like a stone.

Nagisa was frustrated, but Rei was more so. Every time Nagisa offered him advice, the other boy was snap at him. It wasn’t that Nagisa was trying to be critical; it was just that Rei’s form had to be corrected if he was ever going to move forward.

“This time, Rei-chan, try to look up a little more when you swim. You want your hairline to be in line with the surface of the water,” Nagisa explained; although, he didn’t think he was doing a good job. It was hard to talk about swimming in technical terms. Nagisa had learned by seeing the strokes and then copying them in all the wrong ways before he found the right one. He was a good swimmer based on simple trial and error.

Clearly, Rei didn’t think he was doing a good job either. “Do you have any other little notes for me?” he spat. He was wearing goggles but Nagisa could still tell he was glaring.

“Oh, ah… It might be good to think of your head as a weight. Because if you cock your head too far up or two far down, it becomes a 25 pound form of resistance. I think you might be burying your chin into your chest, and that’s part of the reason why you don’t go anywhere when you swim,” Nagisa explained, trying to appear unaffected. Behind his neutral expression, however, he felt like he was about to have a melt down.

He couldn’t do this anymore. Nagisa could talk to anyone and everyone, and he frequently talked to people who didn’t want to listen to him. But he had never had to spend so much time with someone who so obviously didn’t care about a word he was saying. He spent all of his time with Rei feeling attacked.

Nagisa already felt attacked enough at home, he didn’t need Rei to make it worse.

“Sure. I’ll just do that,” Rei said with an eye roll.

“You’ve got this, Rei-chan!” Nagisa chirped.

Rei glared at him as he lowered into the water to try freestyle again. “For the last time, quit calling me Rei-chan,” he complained before dipping his face in the water, straightening out his posture, tilting his head correctly, and…

 _Sinking_.

Rei came up out of the water, sputtering and choking. Nagisa ran a hand through his wet blond hair. “I… I honestly don’t know what to do anymore,” he said, completely dumbfounded. Rin had said Rei was probably overwhelmed talking to Nagisa, but he was pretty sure it was the other way around. Rei _exhausted_ him. “Why don’t you take a break, okay? I’m going to do some laps of my own, and we’ll pick this up tomorrow.”

Rei climbed out of the pool wordlessly, not sparing a glance at Nagisa. Meanwhile, Nagisa climbed up on the starting block to work on his dives. They had always been the sloppiest part of his form, according to Haru, Makoto, and Rin. Maybe if he concentrated hard enough on his diving, he’d be able to forget all about his problems with his fiancé.

* * *

While Haru was anxious to swim in the Samezuka pool, the first joint practice the two clubs had was held at Iwatobi. The full team wasn’t invited, just the captain, Rin, Sousuke, and two underclassmen that showed promise.

“Nitori Aiichiro.”

“Mikoshiba Momotarou.”

Nagisa introduced himself and the ever-shy Rei to the two new Samezuka swimmers as well as the rest of the team. Makoto introduced himself and Haru. After some polite bowing and some warm up laps, the teams started racing in pairs. Rin sauntered over to Rei while Makoto, Momo, and Seijuro raced.

“So, you got stuck with Nagisa, huh?”

Rei blushed and Nagisa wailed. “RinRin! Be nice!”

“Oi, you know I hate it when you call me that,” Rin glowered. Nagisa crossed his arms and pouted. When did all of his conversations start becoming so mean and hurtful? Rin ran a hand through his hair, redirecting the conversation towards Rei. “I heard you’ve been having some trouble with your strokes.” Rei didn’t answer. “You know, I could help you if you want. Sousuke and I are in charge of correcting the first-years when our coach and Seijuro are busy. I bet we could help you, too.”

Rei’s eyes flickered. Nagisa would say he looked hopeful, if he didn’t know Rei to be the most depressing and irritable person he had ever met. However, for once, Rei didn’t seem so tetchy. “Really?” he asked. Nagisa’s jaw dropped.

“Sure. There’s a few lanes open. Let’s go.”

Nagisa just watched from the pool deck as Rei hopped in the water with Rin. Usually it was a battle to get Rei in the water, but Rin didn’t have to harass the other boy at all. Probably because unlike Nagisa, Rei didn’t seem to absolutely _hate_ Rin.

Once again, Nagisa felt discouraged.

Actually, this whole day had been discouraging. Sousuke and Rin were together; Haru and Makoto were together; Momo had gotten out of the pool only to sit in Ai’s lap, so there was no doubt in Nagisa’s mind that they were together, too. It dawned on Nagisa that, yet again, he was the only person who didn’t have a soul mate who cared about him. Rei wasn’t even _nice_ , and Nagisa still cared. Why couldn’t Rei extend the same courtesy?

“Hey, Hazuki-san! You specialize in breaststroke, yeah? Do you want to race?” Ai asked, looking cute and hopeful.

Nagisa felt his face heat up as he looked at the way the first-year’s arms were looped around Momo. All of a sudden, his arms and legs felt shaky and his head felt light. “Sure! Just let me go to the bathroom real fast,” he piped, getting up off the concrete and rushing to the locker room. The second he got there; he threw himself into a stall.

Tears rushed down his already wet cheeks. For once in his life, Nagisa was thankful to be covered in pool water.

This was just so frustrating. He didn’t know what he could possibly be doing to make Rei hate him so much. For someone who had apparently been bullied so badly, he certainly wasn’t very nice himself. He was making Nagisa’s life a living hell. When Nagisa had realized he would have to have a randomly assigned match, he had never thought it would have been as bad as this. The reason Rei didn’t have a fiancé prior to the first day of school was because he was an angry, anti-social _jerk_.

And Nagisa was the annoying, overly loud, undesirable idiot who had gotten paired up with him.

Nagisa gave himself a full sixty seconds to cry. He kept time on his watch, making sure he didn’t stay in the bathroom for over a minute in case people started to wonder where he was. When he came out, he splashed some water in his face and tried not to vomit in the sink. Nagisa didn’t let himself cry often, so when he did, it was rather overemotional, messy affair.

He came out of the locker room smiling, tear tracks completely erased and goggles over his puffy eyes. “Alright, Ai-chan! Let’s go!”

* * *

Nagisa didn’t bother to try to make conversation with Rei on the walk to the train station. The other boy looked at him curiously all the while, but Nagisa didn’t have the energy to figure out why. All he wanted to do was bury himself in his sheets at home or maybe go visit Makoto’s house and let their happy family cheer him up. Makoto was so calming to spend time with, and Ren and Ran were always funny and nice.

He was thinking about the last video game he had played with Makoto’s siblings when Rei spoke up. “Are you all right?” Rei asked, staring down at him in confusion. Nagisa snapped himself out of his daze.

“What?” he asked. He had heard what Rei had said; he was just surprised that the other boy had taken the initiative to speak to him.

“I asked if you were okay. You’re quieter than usual.”

Nagisa winced. He really needed to work on that. Apparently the second he stopped talking, people realized he wasn’t feeling well. “I’m fine, just tired,” he said passively.

Rei frowned. “But… But you’re not _just_ tired, are you?” Rei asked. Nagisa didn’t know how he managed to sound so insecure and so authoritative at the same time. “Because you’re usually tired -tired enough to fall asleep on my shoulder anyway- but now you’re just glaring out the window with your eyes open.”

Nagisa copied Rei’s frown. “Well, who cares if I’m quiet or not? I would have thought you’d like me not being quite so loud,” he snapped.

His eyes widened.

That was the first time he had ever sniped at Rei-chan. Normally, he was upbeat and friendly, if not a little confused by the other boy’s attitude, but now… Now he was just _frustrated._

Rei also seemed thrown by his change in tone. The other boy cleared his throat, pulling at his tie a bit. “I suppose that would have been a reasonable assumption,” Rei replied quietly, and Nagisa had _no idea_ what that was supposed to mean.

They sat in silence again for a while. Nagisa was becoming painfully used to these awkward quiet spells. Normally, conversations with Nagisa involved were always loud, but with Rei it was non-existent.

The more Nagisa thought about how uncomfortable and stressful things were with Rei, the more upset he got. Tears had been burning the back of his eyes ever since before his race with Ai, but only now did Nagisa’s vision grow blurry.

He sniffled. He blinked fast. He hid his face in his hands.

But nothing worked, and despite all of Nagisa’s efforts to keep his emotions to himself and not burden anyone with his problems, his shoulders started to shake and tears started rushing down his cheeks. Rei didn’t comment, and Nagisa foolishly thought that Rei either didn’t notice or didn’t care, but unfortunately, even the grouchy Rei-chan couldn’t ignore a crying Nagisa.

“Hazuki-kun-“

“Nagisa!” he yelped before Rei could finish whatever stupid, cranky thing he was probably going to say. Nagisa turned to look at his partner. “For the love of _Christ_ , Rei-chan, we’re _engaged_. Call me _Nagisa_.”

Rei floundered for a moment. “N-Nagisa-kun…”

“ _What?_ ”

Rei pushed his glasses up on his nose, and then he did something weird. He did something _really_ weird. He reached out and rested a hand on Nagisa’s cheek. Nagisa hiccupped as the other boy thumbed away a tear. “You’re crying.”

Nagisa’s bottom lip wobbled. “Well, yeah, obviously,” he said, anger still running rampant in his heart. Despite how oddly tender Rei was being with him, he couldn’t help but still direct a lot of frustration at the other boy. He wasn’t an easy person to be engaged to, and Nagisa had a feeling they both knew it.

“What’s wrong?”

“What’s _wrong?”_ Nagisa asked, incredulous. He ignored the strange looks the other passengers on the train were sending his way. “What’s _wrong_ is _you!_ You’re so… you’re so…” _Distant. Cruel. Mean. Hurtful. Detached. Angry. Detestable._ “You’re so _bad at this_. We’re supposed to be a team, but you don’t even treat me like a person, much less your other half!” Nagisa yelped.

Nagisa quickly found himself on a roll. As he started to complain, he realized he couldn’t stop, and he didn’t care if everyone else on the train could hear the very personal conversation he was having with his fiancé. It didn’t matter if he and Rei were matched; Nagisa couldn’t bite his tongue and submissively take on all of Rei’s antisocial behavior any longer.

“I know that we were randomly assigned, and I know we don’t know each other, but… but plenty of people end up in this position! Plenty of people have to get engaged to strangers because they don’t have anyone else. But they try to work it out! Because what _psychopath_ only marries their fiancé so they don’t have to pay for an apartment all by themselves? Matches are supposed to be partners for _everything_ , not just the bills! We’re supposed to support each other and care about each other, but the only thing you care about is making sure I don’t talk to you at school. It’s _mean_.” Nagisa stared hard at Rei, refusing to break eye contact with the other boy. “You’ve been _mean._ And with your history, I thought you of all people would know just how terrible being mean can be.”

The train pulled to a stop, and Nagisa grabbed his bag and ran off, even if the stop wasn’t his. He didn’t care about going home anyway. He didn’t care about what Rei had to say in response to his outburst. The only thing he wanted to do was swim again, knowing the chlorine sometimes helped to clear his head.

Nagisa tied his shoes a little tighter before heading back to school.

* * *

“Ah, thought we’d find you here!” Makoto mused as Nagisa surfaced. His limbs were burning. For the first time, he noticed that the sun had gone down and he was swimming in the dark. Nagisa took off his goggles.

Makoto was standing above the pool with a towel open and ready in his hands. “Your mom called and asked if we knew where you were,” he said, nodding towards Haru, who was already stripping to jump in the water. Makoto smiled comfortingly at him. “Looks like she cares more than you thought she did, huh?”

Nagisa didn’t respond. He just sniffled a couple times, trying not to cry again. He’d already cried twice today, he didn’t need a repeat.

Makoto nudged him with one of his flip-flops. “Come on out, yeah?”

Nagisa wrapped his arms around his waist for a moment before pulling himself out of the pool. Makoto quickly wrapped the towel around him, but didn’t pull away. Instead, his arms stayed tightly around Nagisa’s shoulders as he held his towel up. He all but forced Nagisa’s wet head onto his shoulder, and Nagisa closed his eyes as Makoto’s strong arms rubbed his back through the towel, both calming him down and drying him off.

“Let’s take a seat,” Makoto offered. He sat on the edge of the pool and pulled Nagisa down with him. Their feet dangled in the cold water, Makoto not caring when his shorts got wet in the puddle forming around the pool deck. They watched Haru swim back in forth for a minute.

“You know, he really is beautiful,” Nagisa mused, unable to keep his eyes of Haru’s relaxed form. So many swimmers looked so tense when they swam, but Haru looked completely at ease.

“He is, isn’t he?” Makoto said; although his tone made it seem that he was speaking in a completely different context than Nagisa. Makoto turned to look at him. Nagisa crinkled his nose as the upperclassman removed his goggles. “You’re eyes are puffy.”

Nagisa shrugged. “I may or may not have cried on the train ride home today.”

Makoto looked taken aback. “Did you?” he asked, although the answer was obvious.

Nagisa nodded, water droplets falling from his hair down onto the bridge of his nose. “I also may or may not have done a lot of my crying in front of Rei and yelled at him in the process.”

“Oh, Nagisa, that’s no good.”

Nagisa sighed. “I know. I’m just… Well, you hear how he talks to me when I’m teaching him how to swim. It’s like… It’s like I’m the biggest burden to ever walk the face of the planet, and I try so hard to not be. I try so, _so_ hard to keep everyone happy and be a good person to spend time with, and… and… and…”

Makoto shushed him gently. He grabbed the corner of Nagisa’s towel and rubbed his head with it, drying off his hair. Nagisa closed his eyes and let the feel of Makoto’s long, strong fingers on his scalp relax him. “You do try so hard, don’t you?” he asked. For once, he didn’t lecture Nagisa on how it was important to trust people and how he’d never been a burden to anyone.

Nagisa’s face crumbled up, and a loud sob emitted from his tiny frame. So much for not crying again today. Fortunately, however, he was in good hands, and Makoto immediately pulled him into his lap, like he would do for Ren and Ran.

Despite being such a tiny person, Nagisa didn’t often feel small. But right now he felt absolutely miniscule, swallowed up by Makoto’s arms with the corner of the other boy’s glasses digging into his temple. His chest heaved wildly as he cried. Never before had Nagisa felt so completely overwhelmed.

Haru seemed to notice that things with Nagisa were going from bad to worse. He pulled himself out of the pool and came to Nagisa’s side, dripping wet. Makoto laughed. “Looks like Haru must love you, huh? He stopped swimming for you,” he said conspiringly, as if talking about Haru’s emotions was as shocking as talking about his underwear or how good he was in bed.

It managed to get a small, choked laugh out of Nagisa, so obviously Makoto was doing something right.

Haru sighed at sat down with his friends. Nagisa leaned further into Makoto’s chest. He realized that Makoto was rocking him gently back and forth in an effort to keep him calm. It felt like Nagisa was floating in the ocean.

He closed his eyes. “I don’t want to go home,” he said, voice hoarse but his tears slowing.

“You can stay at my house,” Haru offered. Nagisa nodded, knowing that would be fine. After all, Nagisa had a toothbrush hidden under Haru’s sink for nights like these. He could wear his uniform two times in a row, and he was sure Haru wouldn’t mind loaning him a pair of underwear. It was settled. “You have to call your parents, though. Make sure it’s okay with them.”

Before Nagisa could argue, Makoto stood up, taking Nagisa with him. “You must be exhausted,” he mused, placing Nagisa on his feet for just a minute. Makoto turned around. “Hop on.”

“Ah!” Nagisa jumped up onto Makoto’s back for a piggyback ride, a massive smile breaking through his tears like the sun breaking through clouds on a rainy day. He squeezed Makoto tight and laughed a little as Makoto carried him home.

Halfway there, Haru held out a ringing phone to Nagisa. Nagisa sighed but took Haru’s cellphone anyway, wincing as he explained to his mother why he hadn’t come home, why he hadn’t called, and where he would be spending the night. He breathed out a sigh of relief when she gave him permission to stay over at Haru’s, but not without her usual yelling and screaming.

Nagisa handed Haru back his phone when it was all over, burying his nose into Makoto’s neck.

“You okay?” Haru asked.

“I’m a disappointment,” Nagisa said, filling the other boy in on the gist of the conversation. He tried to distract himself by flicking temple tips of Makoto’s glasses to make the frames bounce up and down on the older boy’s nose.

Makoto laughed. “Cut it out,” he said good-naturedly. Nagisa hummed. Apparently Makoto thought he must be absolutely worn out because usually during times like these, Makoto was usually reminding him not to listen to his mother and that while his parents were good at pointing out Nagisa’s faults, he had a million good characteristics to stay positive about.

Nagisa closed his eyes and rested heavily on Makoto’s back. Today had been terrible. But with today being so bad, that meant tomorrow had to be better. Nagisa got himself ready for bed with that in mind, knowing that waking up snuggled in bed with Haru would be the first good part to the next day.

* * *

Rei didn’t show up to practice the day after their fight, but Rin did.

“Hey, where’s Rei at?” he asked, sauntering onto Iwatobi’s pool deck like he owned it.

Nagisa rolled his eyes, his usual demeanor back in place despite how depressing he had been the day before. “Don’t talk about it.”

Rin crouched down by the edge of the pool where Nagisa leaning. The blond had his elbows placed up on the coping, his chin resting on his forearms as he calmly kicked at the water behind him. Nagisa’s arms were tired. He was taking a break, but his legs didn’t seem to understand that it was okay to stop moving. Meanwhile, Rin pulled his hair back into a ponytail. “I take it you don’t know, then?” he asked, stray strands of hair escaping from his elastic and falling into his eyes.

Nagisa shook his head. “No one does. I didn’t even see him in class earlier.” Nagisa was trying to keep positive about Rei not being in school. At least this way he didn’t have to see him today, even if he was desperate to know what the other boy was thinking. “Why? Did you need him?”

Rin scratched at the back of his neck. With arms as big as Rin’s, Nagisa didn’t even know how it was possible for him to reach back there. He would have thought his massive shoulders or biceps would have gotten in the way. “Well, yeah,” Rin answered. “He practically begged me to come back and keep helping him learn how to swim.”

“And you agreed?”

“… Sure.” Rin seem flustered. “He was so grateful for my help yesterday. He actually started moving forward instead of just down, which was a massive improvement. And, anyways, I feel bad for him. You, Makoto, and Haru are all amazing swimmers; I put you on my relay team in elementary school for a reason, remember?” he asked, trying and failing to tuck his loose strands of hair behind his ears. “You guys are all the best of the best. It must suck for Rei, not being able to keep up with you three.”

Nagisa pressed his lips together considering this. He squinted up seriously at Rin. “You’re right, Rin-chan. And I’m not a good teacher, so I’m glad you’re here.”

“Yeah, but Rei isn’t, so there’s not really a point is there,” he asked, crossing his arms together.

Nagisa hummed. “I guess… But I am, yeah? Wanna race? I’ll go easy on you, we can swim free instead of breast,” he offered with a wink. A devilish smile crept up Rin’s face, showing off his impressively pointed teeth.

“Please. Breaststroke may be your specialty, but I could still beat your ass easy.”

“Prove it!” Nagisa yelped, jumping out of the pool and getting up on the starting block. Rin followed suit almost immediately, snapping his goggles into place. “Three… two… one… go!”

* * *

“Do you not see how _irresponsible_ you’ve been? Your sisters never did anything like this! They would come home at a reasonable hour, call us when they would be out late, sleep in their own _beds!_ I don’t know what’s gotten into you-“

“Mom!“

“When your father gets home tonight, hearing from me will be the _least_ of your worries. You can’t keep doing crazy things like this, Nagisa! First with the mediocre high school, and then with the bizarre clothes you’ve started wearing, and then with the swimming, and you still sneak off and don’t tell us where you are-“

“Mom!”

“We’ve stood by and watched you make so many poor decisions, but it’s time you owned up and took responsibility for your actions! You’re not the baby of the family anymore! You’re going to be married in three years, it’s about time you acted like it-“

“ _Mom!_ ” Nagisa interrupted, screaming so hard his voice hurt to be heard over his mother. “I think someone’s knocking at the door!”

“What?” she asked, almost like she was coming out of a daze. Sometimes, Nagisa could swear that the only thing his mother thought about was Nagisa and all of his mistakes. It was pointless to talk back to her, to explain that Iwatobi was a good fit for him to keep him from getting overly stressed again, and to inform her that his favorite pair of tight, purple capris weren’t as ridiculous as she liked to pretend they were. No, most of the time Nagisa would just let her or his father’s yelling run its course until they sent him to his room.

But today, someone was at the front door.

“Someone’s knocking, Mom,” he repeated, sighing as he said it. He knew he would be chastised for his attitude later, but he couldn’t be bothered to care.

“Well, then, answer it,” she said, like it was the most obvious thing to do in the world. Like Nagisa hadn’t been otherwise occupied.

Getting yelled at.

By _her._

His mother was beyond frustrating, and Nagisa was thankful to be given the opportunity to get away from her. He all but ran through the apartment to reach the front door. He plastered a large smile on his face. “Hello, what- Oh.” Nagisa felt like the air had been knocked out of him. “Rei-chan.”

“Hello, Nagisa-kun.” Rei scratched the back of his neck, looking uncomfortable. “It’s… it’s _loud_ in there,” he said.

Nagisa laughed a bit –whether at how awkward Rei was or how rude his comment had been, Nagisa wasn’t sure- and held his door open a little wider. “Do you want to come in? My mom sounds really mad, but she won’t mind you stepping in if you need something.”

Nagisa regretted asking the question almost immediately. Rei seemed at war with himself, uncomfortably shifting his weight from foot to foot. Once again, Nagisa could see why most of their classmates wrote him off as shy. In fact, Rei _did_ act shy _most_ of the time. It was just when he was with Nagisa that he acted like a jerk. “Well… Well…” Rei looked lost. “There _is_ something I feel like I need to talk to you about.”

Nagisa nodded, trying not to show how anxious he was. “Sure thing!” he agreed easily, beckoning Rei in. “My room is the last door on the right,” he said, gesturing to the hallway that led towards the bedrooms. “I’ll meet you there in a second. Let me just tell my mom we have company.”

Fortunately, his mother wasn’t too distressed when Nagisa said he was inviting his fiancé in. In fact, she looked rather pleased, considering she had yet to meet Rei and Nagisa hadn’t had much to say about him. He was certain that being randomly matched was just another reason his parents were disappointed in him, but maybe finding out her son was engaged to someone as handsome and smart as Rei would make her a little more proud of him.

Learning that Rei was just as critical of Nagisa as she and her husband were would probably only make his mother warm up to him more.

“Okay, she’s cool with it. She just wants to meet you after we’re done, though, if that’s okay,” Nagisa said, stepping into his room. Rei didn’t look at him, but rather ogled at his plants, windows, and blue and white striped walls.

“There’s a lot of blues and greens in here.”

Nagisa giggled. It was like Rei hadn’t even heard him. “Yeah, well, they’re supposed to be calming colors that help with depression and anxiety and stuff,” he said dismissively. He wasn’t about to tell Rei about all his problems –at least not yet- but he figured letting this one thing slip wouldn’t hurt.

Rei eyed him disparagingly for a moment. Nagisa chatted mindlessly to fill the silence.

“Although, blue and green aren’t my favorite colors. I actually really like pink, but my mom thinks that’s a little too girly for a boy’s room. But I get to pick out all my own clothes, so I _wear_ it an awful lot, even if the only pink thing in my bedroom is a pillow,” he babbled. He was hoping to procrastinate talking about whatever Rei had come here for. A thought dawned on him. “Hey, wait a minute, how did you get my address?”

“I texted Rin-san.”

“Of course you did,” Nagisa said with a sigh, turning to his right to avoid looking at Rei. He stared out one of his windows until he felt like he could smile again. “You two have been getting along pretty well, haven’t you?” he asked brightly.

Rei tilted his head at him. “Yes, well… I didn’t come here today to talk about Rin-san. I came to apologize,” he replied.

Nagisa stood frozen.

“Um… you did?”

“Yes,” Rei answered seriously, nodding his head. “I didn’t realize that my behavior was upsetting you so much. I thought… I thought…” Nagisa would do anything to get Rei to _spit it out_. “I thought you didn’t like _me._ I never thought in a million years that you would be hurt if I didn’t like _you_.”

Nagisa rubbed his nose with the back of his hand. “What is _that_ supposed to mean?” he asked, climbing up on his bed. He patted the spot next to him on the mattress to let Rei know that he was invited to sit with him, too. Rei sat down, but his back stayed ramrod straight.

“I don’t know,” he replied despairingly. “It’s just… Well, you’re a pretty popular guy, aren’t you, Nagisa-kun? Everyone in our class admires you, and somehow you ended up getting paired with _me_ of all people. I wrongfully assumed that you thought less of me because I wasn’t matched prior to the engagement ceremony, and that you were most likely disappointed that we were forced into being couple,” Rei explained. “I figured that by removing the pressure to force an unlikely friendship, I was doing you a favor. I didn’t want our engagement to feel any more obligatory than it already was.”

“But Rei-chan, obviously I wanted to spend time with you and get to know you. I asked you to join the swim club at least eight thousand times! Why would I do that if I didn’t want to spend time with you and make friends?”

“I told you I didn’t swim!”

“So?”

“So, based off of past experiences and my confession of being an unskilled swimmer, I assumed that you solely wanted me to join to make fun of my athleticism. I expected that you, Haruka-senpai, and Makoto-senpai all laughed about my failed attempts at swimming behind my back.”

Nagisa looked at Rei with wide unblinking eyes. Rei adjusted his glasses. “Rei-chan, we’ve never _once_ done that. We haven’t even _thought_ to do that; whenever your name comes up, it’s to talk about how good it is that we have a fourth person on our team or about why you seem to hate me so much.”

“I don’t hate you.”

“But you always snap at me!”

“I don’t… take criticism well,” Rei mumbled, his cheeks staining pink.

Nagisa sighed and rubbed at one of his triceps, not sure what to make of this conversation. He huffed out a sigh. “I just don’t get it… Gou said that kids bullied you in middle school, but _geez_ , it must have been awful to make you this paranoid about someone like me. Ask Haru-chan, I hardly ever say bad things about anyone. The worst I ever get is sometimes calling Mako-chan a scaredy-cat when we watch horror movies together.”

Rei didn’t respond. Nagisa chewed on his bottom lip, thinking.

“Well… well, okay. Let’s say I buy all that crap, right? That you were just being defensive and hurting me before I could get the chance to hurt you. It still doesn’t it add up. It doesn’t make sense that you would ignore me in class, be rude to me during practice, and then let me fall asleep on your shoulder on the train ride home.”

Rei pressed his lips together.

“Rei-chan?”

“Look,” Rei replied, once again refusing to make eye contact. “I know we’re engaged, and I guess from here on out we’re going to be working on making friends-” Nagisa’s heart beat a little faster in excitement. “-and I assume that eventually we’ll know everything about each other’s lives, but I’m not comfortable talking about why I don’t want to be seen together by our classmates. Not yet.”

Nagisa scratched his head. “But you’re going to start being nicer to me? You’re going to start actually answering my questions and trying to get to know me?”

Rei nodded. “Yeah… Yeah, it’s just… You’re not calling me Rei-chan to make fun of me, right? You just… you just do that with everyone? Even the people you’ve just met?”

Nagisa laughed half-heartedly. “Yeah, I do that,” he replied, not caring enough to look embarrassed.

Rei nodded to himself. “Okay… Okay, well, then, yes. I definitely promise to put forth more effort in this relationship from this point on.”

“Great!” Nagisa yelped, clapping his hands together. “Okay, now let’s have you meet my mom, huh? That can be the first official couple thing we do!” Nagisa giggled at Rei’s terrified face. “Don’t worry, she yells at me a lot, but she’s going to love you,” he promised, pushing Rei out into his living room.

* * *

“Rei-chan, Rei-chan! You’re here!” Nagisa exclaimed the second Rei walked into the locker room. “We missed you yesterday! Rin came looking for you, but you weren’t here!”

Rei seemed a little alarmed by how loud Nagisa was being and how excited he was, but he controlled himself well. He adjusted his glasses with his forefinger and thumb, leaving his head bent and his hand on his frames as he spoke. “Yes, well, I assumed it would be inappropriate to come to practice after our talk on the train the other day.”

“But you’re here now!” Nagisa pointed out, excited. Rei’s eyes widened, but his facial expression softened after a moment. Nagisa couldn’t be sure, but he was almost certain he saw a tiny smile on Rei’s face.

“Of course. I promised you we’d start properly spending time together,” he said, his voice quiet enough that Makoto had to lean out from behind his locker in order to eavesdrop. Nagisa laughed as he caught the older boy trying to listen in.

“Mako-chan, you’re terrible at being sneaky!” Nagisa teased, bumping his hip against Makoto’s.

The older boy at least had the manners to look embarrassed. “Sorry, it’s just… You two are working things out, huh?” he asked, smiling brightly at Rei despite the blush on his cheeks.

Rei seemed flustered. “Um… Y-yes, we’ve… we’ve agreed to try to make friends.” Leave it to Rei to start stammering the second anyone talked to him.

Nagisa decided to bail him out. “Right, and it’s already going swimmingly!” Nagisa joked, winking. Makoto groaned at the bad pun; meanwhile, Haru nodded approvingly on the other side of the locker room. Sometimes, Nagisa could talk for ages and think that Haru wasn’t listening, but then he would do something that proved he had been paying attention the entire time.

“I don’t know if I would say that,” Rei replied.

Nagisa absentmindedly jumped on the other boy’s back. His legs wrapped around Rei’s waist and his arms around his shoulders. “Of course you wouldn’t. You wouldn’t say _anything_ , Rei-chan, you’re too quiet.”

Makoto laughed at Rei’s stricken face. The only things Rei seemed capable of doing were blushing and staring in horror at the limbs snaked around his torso. Makoto clapped Rei on the shoulder. “Watch out for this one, he’s clingy,” he warned, ruffling Nagisa’s hair as he walked out of the locker room.

“It’s true, it’s impossible to shake him off,” Haru agreed as he tucked his hair into his swim cap.

“You know you like it, Haru-chan. You love it almost as much as Rei-chan does,” Nagisa replied mischievously. Haru glared at him as he put on his goggles. He looked so ridiculous with his swim cap and goggles on that Nagisa couldn’t help but giggle. He hid his face in Rei’s neck as Haru stormed out, and he was still laughing when he felt Rei tense beneath him.

“Nagisa-kun, I still have to get changed.”

“Oh, right, right!” Nagisa replied, climbing down. He tugged his jammers up a little higher on his hips. “Wait, Rei-chan, do you mind touching? Because you let me sleep on you all the time, so that must mean you don’t mind being close, right?”

Rei fumbled with the buttons on his uniform. “I don’t _mind_ it, no, but I also don’t go around demanding piggyback rides and snuggling up next to people I hardly know,” he said, shucking his shirt.

“That’s the difference between you and I,” Nagisa mused. “You’re a ‘later’ kind of person, and I like things to happen _now_ ,” he explained.

“You are rather immediate,” Rei mused. “One second we’re strangers, the next we’re engaged.”

“Well, that wasn’t _my_ fault.”

“True… But everything else with you has been just as quick.” Nagisa hummed in agreement. It was weird to hear Rei say this much at once. He complained during their swimming lessons, of course, but he didn’t carry conversation like this. It was exciting to hear Rei offer up his thoughts without having to be pestered or questioned.

Nagisa opened his mouth to agree, but before he could, Rin arrived. Rei seemed happy to see him and quickly got changed so he could begin perfecting his strokes.

Feeling more energetic than usual, Nagisa grabbed a pair of paddles from their equipment stash. Things were finally starting to go his way. He felt like he could do anything, including a more high intensity work out. Nagisa’s heart was soaring as he swam.

* * *

The train rattled beneath Nagisa’s feet. He wobbled a bit as the train went over a particularly large bump. He fell backwards into Rei’s chest, but fortunately, his match was used to riding bouncy trains with Nagisa and he caught him easily. “Careful,” Rei said caringly.

Nagisa smiled up at his fiancé. “Hey, you know what we should do?” He answered his own question before Rei could even try. “We should play question tennis.”

Rei pushed his glasses further up on his nose. “I suppose there’s no point saying no to you, is there?”

Nagisa snickered behind his hand. “Rei-chan, you’re learning!” he cheered. He grabbed one of the other boy’s hands. “But, okay, the game is really easy. All you do is answer a question and then ask a question back and forth, like a tennis match, you know?”

“Okay. So, say, if you started, you’d ask me some question –personal or otherwise- and then I’d answer it and ask _you_ a question. And we’d keep taking turns until someone made a mistake. Is that correct?”

“Yeah, you’ve got it!” Nagisa cheered. “Are we starting?”

“I don’t know; it’s up to you. _Are_ we starting?”

Nagisa giggled and jumped up and down. “Yes, yes, we’re starting!” he decided, recovering quickly after falling into Rei again. It was like the train was _trying_ to knock him over. “Okay, so if you had to have your skin as one color and your hair as another color, what would you pick?” he asked.

Rei looked thrown. “I didn’t realize the questions would be so ridiculous,” he sputtered, but Nagisa could see that the gears in the other boy’s head were turning. He waited patiently for his partner’s answer. “I suppose if I had to choose, I would pick light blue skin and dark green hair. What would you pick?”

“I would be bright yellow with bright pink hair,” he decided with a nod. Nagisa dressed mainly in pastels, but he felt like he was too bright of a person to choose light colored features. “But okay, next question. Um… You can visit any country in the world right now, and it won’t cost anything or take any time to get there. Where would you go?”

“Now, that’s a relevant question,” Rei said approvingly. “I would probably go to Niagra Falls. It’s far away, so it would be difficult and expensive to get there in normal circumstances. Using the opportunity to travel so efficiently wouldn’t be wasted, and besides-“ Rei got a wistful look in his eye, “-that much water with that wide of a river… The sight would be breathtakingly beautiful.” Nagisa grinned fondly. If there was one thing he had learned about Rei, it was that he certainly appreciated beauty. He also appreciated logic, and Nagisa could’ve guessed his answer. “Where would you go, Nagisa-kun?”

Nagisa giggled. “You’re supposed to think of your own questions! But I think I would go to Egypt and take tours inside the pyramids. Or maybe I would go to Spain and run with the bulls. Or maybe I’d go to Russia and ride the Trans-Siberian Express! Or maybe I’d go to the United States and learn how to surf!” As Nagisa listed his exciting travel ideas, he noticed that Rei was smiling goofily at him. “What are you grinning about?” he asked.

“Nothing, it’s just… That was a very Nagisa-kun answer,” Rei replied, blushing. “… What’s your favorite food?”

“Oh, good question, Rei-chan! I like strawberry shortcake best, I think. What’s your favorite book?”

Rei adjusted his glasses again, but in a different way than usual. Nagisa was starting to learn the differences between the ways Rei played with his frames. It seemed to be an absent-minded compulsion. Rei’s hands would restlessly fiddle with his lenses when he was embarrassed or stressed. (Unfortunately, he seemed to play with his glasses in this way most of the time.) However, when he was in deep thought like he was now, his hand would stay frozen with his head tilted down as he thought.

Nagisa liked watching Rei like this, with his thumb and pointer finger straddling his glasses on either side.

“I think… I think _Outliers_ by Malcolm Gladwell,” he eventually answered. “What is your favorite?”

“Probably _Spud._ It’s one of the only books I’ve ever had the patience to read because, well, it’s really funny. It’s about this boy who has to go to this South African boarding school, and he has all these crazy roommates with crazy names, and, and, and, the opening scene of the book begins with his dad shooting the neighbor’s dogs with a high-pressure weed sprayer only in his underwear,” Nagisa recounted. He looked up at Rei-chan with wide eyes. “What’s your book about?”

“Well, it’s certainly not as ridiculous as that sounds,” Rei replied. “It explains why certain people are successful and why others aren’t. People pay too much attention to what high-achievers are like, and not enough attention to where they are from. This book analyzes the upbringing of billionaires and geniuses.”

“That sounds depressing.”

“But it’s not,” Rei argued. “It’s interesting. At least, it’s more interesting than the books I usually read about quantum physics and running theories.”

Nagisa huffed out a sigh. “No, you know what’s interesting? _Round Ireland with a Fridge._ ”

“What’s that?”

“Another book I managed to finish. It’s a true story about this comedian who has, like, a _religious_ experience after he sees this man in Ireland trying to hitch hike with a refrigerator. And he talks about it so much, that he makes a drunken bet with his friend to try to travel around the circumference of Ireland with a refrigerator in thirty days or less, otherwise he owes his friend, like, 100 dollars!”

“Nagisa-kun, that book sounds even more ridiculous than the last one.”

Nagisa pouted. “But it’s not ridiculous, it’s funny! Especially because the mini-fridge he buys to complete the challenge is 130 dollars, so even if he hitch hikes the whole way around, he’s still losing at least 30 dollars. Isn’t that crazy?”

Rei didn’t respond for a moment, too busy staring fondly at Nagisa. The train bumped along, and once again, Nagisa lost his footing. He collapsed into Rei, their torsos lining up.

Nagisa’s eyes widened and his lips parted. Rei looked down at him, eyes just as wide. Nagisa could hear the other boy’s heart beating, his ear was so close to the other boy’s chest. “Rei-chan,” he gasped.

“Yes?”

“You… You, um… You forgot to ask a question,” Nagisa pointed out, pulling away. Rei’s eyebrows furrowed together in confusion. Slowly a smile took over his face.

“So I did,” he realized. “You can be very distracting, Nagisa-kun.”

For once, a blush swept over Nagisa’s face instead of Rei’s.

* * *

“Hey, so how’s it going with Rei? Rin says he’s been talking about you.”

Nagisa sat up quickly at the sound of Makoto’s words. He had come home with Makoto and Haru for the afternoon, and they were now settled together on Mako-chan’s bed with Nagisa in the middle.

Nagisa had been quiet all afternoon, trying to focus on the video games they were playing instead of the things his father had screamed at him the night before. There were days that were more stressful than others back at home. Fortunately, Haru and Makoto were more than willing to open up their homes to him when things got tough.

“He’s been talking about me?” Nagisa asked around his raspberry popsicle.

“Well, you know how Rei is. He hasn’t said _a lot_ , but Rin said that they had a nice long conversation about how earnest you are.”

“Earnest?”

“Yeah. Rei likes how genuine you can be. You’re always saying what you think and how you feel.”

Haru snorted. “That’s not true.” When Nagisa looked up at Haru, hurt expression in place, the other boy seemed to melt a little bit. It was the most emotion Nagisa had seen from him in awhile. “When it comes to serious things, you clam up.”

Nagisa sighed. He knew exactly what Haru was talking about, but he had been hoping that for once, his friends wouldn’t bug him about his home life. It was hard for Nagisa to talk about his parents. He was embarrassed to repeat the things his mom and dad said about him, and he had become so used to getting yelled at that half the time he didn’t think it was worth mentioning.

If it had been up to Nagisa, Haru and Makoto wouldn’t know about how tough things were at his house. However, after countless afternoons spent watching movies and playing games, his friends had overheard the way his parents spoke to him. Nagisa could remember the first time Haru and Makoto had seen him get yelled at.

It was right after Rin had left for Australia. Nagisa had started an impromptu game of tag by stealing a piece of mackerel from Haru’s bento box and running away with it. Even in elementary school, Nagisa had way too much energy. His mom had warned him about running in the apartment hundreds of times, but Nagisa could never slow down. Everything was such an adventure. He was excited all of the time, how could he possibly keep from running?

Nagisa had skidded around a corner, giggling as his sock covered feet pounded across the hardwood floor. All of a sudden, his feet slipped out from under him and he fell to the floor. Nagisa slid hard into an end table and the lamp on top wobbled and fell over.

Nagisa could remember Makoto calling his name as the porcelain lamp shattered around him. The broken glass cut his feet and legs, and his knee and hip hurt from falling. Tears poured down Nagisa’s cheeks and sobs shook his tiny frame. His mom, hearing the noise, had rushed out of her bedroom to see what had happened.

Her response, while expected by Nagisa, was clearly not what his friends had thought would happen. “ _Nagisa, what have I told you about running in the house?”_ she screamed at her crying son. “ _You stupid boy. Your sisters would have never done something so foolish! For goodness sake, you should be crying, what with how ridiculous your behavior has been lately! I hope you’re guilty, I hope you’re sorry!”_

Makoto and Haru had looked terrified.

But now his friends didn’t seem scared, only resigned. They were used to Nagisa needing an escape from his parents. It only took a couple instances similar to the lamp-breaking situation for them to understand just how Nagisa was treated at home, and fortunately for the blonde, they quickly took responsibility for him. He’d always been the baby of the swim team, and even now that they were all in high school, that was still true.

“What happened this time?” Haru asked when Nagisa didn’t take the bait.

“I dunno… The usual,” Nagisa answered. His popsicle was melting in his hand, but he didn’t feel like eating it anymore. He threw it out in Makoto’s trashcan and wiped off his sticky fingers.

“What’s the usual?”

“Getting yelled at,” Nagisa said. His heart felt like it was beating in his throat, but he refused to let it show on his face. He refused to even admit to _himself_ that he was anxious. After all, they’d had this very same conversation at least a million times before.

“Nagisa,” Makoto piped up. Nagisa tensed. He hated when Makoto said his name that way. He somehow managed to wrap up ‘we love you and care about you, please talk to us’ in a single word, and every time it made Nagisa say more than he wanted to.

“Listen, it’s not a big deal, okay? I’m just… My grades aren’t great at Iwatobi, even though it’s an easier school, and they don’t understand how that could happen,” he explained.

“Well… well how _could_ that happen?” Makoto asked, nose crinkling. “You’ve always been so smart, your classes should be a piece of cake this year.”

Nagisa hummed. Not for the first time, he wished his parents would address problems like Makoto addressed problems. He was so gentle and kind. Or even better, he wished his parents were like Haru. Haru didn’t care about grades, or manners, or anything like that. “I think the more stressed I am, the harder it is to study.”

“You mean the more depressed?”

Nagisa’s face crinkled up in anger. “Stop it, Makoto,” he said, dropping the ‘-chan’ to show how serious he was. He hated when his friends brought that up.

“Depression can make it hard to focus and get things done. It can also make you really tired, and I know you’ve been having trouble staying awake on the train ride home. You told us about falling asleep on Rei,” Makoto listed, ignoring Nagisa’s demands that he not talk about his feelings like this.

Nagisa huffed out a sigh. If Makoto wouldn’t drop the subject, then he would just have to change it. “Actually, I don’t really fall asleep on Rei-chan as much anymore. Most of the time we just talk about stuff,” he said. “We’ve been playing this game called question tennis? And it’s been really fun, I feel like I’m finally getting to know him,” he said positively.

Makoto cheered up alongside Nagisa, easily getting swept up in the conversation. If there was one thing Nagisa was good at, it was distracting Makoto. “Well, that’s good news!”

Haru was the only one to stay on subject. “Nagisa, you still haven’t-“

“ONII-CHAN!”  
“HARU!”

Nagisa sat up a bit straighter as he heard Ren and Ran scream through the house. Nagisa had visited Makoto’s house enough times to know when his siblings were fighting. Ren would always count on Makoto to take his side, while Ran shouted for Haru. “Looks like duty calls,” Nagisa pointed out, happy to weasel out of another conversation about his parents. Haru glared but stood up with Makoto to take care of the twins. Nagisa patted himself on the back for another crisis averted.

* * *

With the knowledge that Rei had begun to talk about him with Rin, Nagisa started to grow a little more confident. Makoto had said Rei liked how earnest he was. A quick text to Rin had confirmed that to be true. Rin had also added that Rei liked how outgoing and positive he was.

For a while, Nagisa had assumed that Rei tolerated him rather than liked him. But apparently, he had been wrong. There were lots of things that Rei liked about Nagisa.

It was starting to feel like they had a shot at being a real couple. Even just the thought of having someone to share the load and unwind with took a ridiculous amount of stress off of Nagisa’s shoulders. He finally had a chance at a relationship. All his worries were over.

With his lessened anxiety over the matter, Nagisa felt like he could properly talk to Rei. The more they bonded, the more comfortable Nagisa felt, and the more comfortable he felt, the more affectionate he became. He was practically all over Rei, even when the other boy clearly felt awkward about all the physical contact. Nagisa just wanted to be _close._ He couldn’t help but do things like tuck himself into Rei’s side or crawl into his lap.

Additionally, Nagisa was a little sappier in the way he spoke to Rei. It was like he was a machine specifically designed to pay Rei compliments. Even now, in the middle of relay practice, Nagisa couldn’t help but dote on his fiancé.

“Looking good, Rei-chan! In more ways than one!” Nagisa teased as Rei dove over him and into the water. Nagisa giggled at the way Rei’s butterfly faltered.

“You keep flustering him,” Haru said, miffed.

Nagisa pulled himself out of the pool. “Rei-chan is always flustered,” he said passively, watching Rei swim. “Come on, Rei-chan! You’re so great! You’ve got this!”

* * *

Rei raised his hand to answer a question at the board. Despite being bored out of his mind, Nagisa watched his match write out the equation carefully. The second he was done, Nagisa tore out a piece of paper and wrote a hasty note. As soon as Rei was back in his seat and the teacher was done praising Rei for his good work, Nagisa flicked the folded up sheet of paper at the back of Rei’s head.

Rei flinched when the note made impact. His head turned as he caught sight of the paper, and Nagisa beamed when he picked it up off the ground. He watched as Rei read his letter.

_‘Rei-chan, you’re so cute! Good job at the board, Mr. Smartypants! XOXO!!!’_

Rei shot him a confused look as he crinkled up the sheet of paper. Later, as they got changed for swim, Rei lectured him for disrupting math so rudely, but Nagisa didn’t care. Complimenting Rei was worth it.

* * *

“Rei-chan, we got our pants switched up, I think,” Nagisa frowned. The trousers he had on were definitely too large for him. They bunched up at the ankles. All of Nagisa’s pants had been hemmed to fit, but these were for someone with much longer legs and much fuller hips.

“I think you might be right,” Rei agreed, looking absolutely _ridiculous_ in Nagisa’s super short, super skinny pants.

One look at him made Nagisa double over in laugher. “Rei-chan… Rei-chan, oh my god…” he snorted.

“That’s quite enough, Nagisa-kun, you look just as ridiculous as I do. Your pants are at your knees,” Rei said haughtily.

Nagisa looked down at his legs and just laughed harder. Rei’s pants had slipped off his waist and had fallen halfway to the floor. He smacked his locker door over and over as he tried to pull himself together, a tear rolling down his cheek because he was laughing so hard.

Eventually, he managed to calm down enough to trade pants with Rei. “You’re so cute, Rei-chan,” he promised as they switched. “I’m sorry I laughed, it was just… Well, my pants _really_ don’t fit you. But you’re beautiful, I promise.”

Rei didn’t need to say anything. His blush said it all for him.

* * *

Nagisa tightened his running shoes. He had spent nearly every morning since the beginning of the school year watching for Rei as the train sped by. It was exciting to spot him running on his way to school. Nagisa liked seeing his hair glued to his face with sweat and his shirt and shorts rumpled on his body. It was the only time Nagisa saw Rei when he wasn’t perfectly put together.

Nagisa was fully aware that he couldn’t talk to Rei during school, and he wouldn’t push the other boy. He had made a promise to leave him alone during class. But he _did_ hope that Rei might allow him to join in on his morning runs. After all, it was before class, and Nagisa wasn’t a bad runner. They ran during practice for conditioning, and Nagisa used to run from his house to the Iwatobi Swim Club with Makoto, Haru, and Rin during their elementary school days. He could keep up with Rei; he knew he could.

Nagisa waited patiently on the path next to the train tracks. He peered down the road, searching for Rei. The second he saw him, he started jumping up and down in excitement. “Rei-chan! Rei-chan!” Nagisa yelped, waving both hands to get the other boy to acknowledge him. “Do you mind if I run with you this morning?”

Rei wasn’t even panting as he ran past Nagisa. “If you can keep up,” he agreed, speeding by so he didn’t loose his momentum.

Nagisa smirked and quickly fell into pace alongside Rei. It wasn’t the first time they had run together, but it was the first time they had done so without Makoto and Haru. With only two sets of lungs working, their breathing soon fell into sync.

“It’s so cool that you run to school in the morning. I thought I might, too,” Nagisa said. He wasn’t breathing heavy yet, but he was well aware that this was easier for Rei than it was for him. That was okay. Swimming was way easier for Nagisa than it was for Rei.

“That’s a great idea. Running in the morning helps with blood flow and metabolism. Also, the air is better for running. It’s not only cooler and more comfortable, but additionally, it holds less pollution,” Rei said factually. Nagisa tilted his head to the side.

“Really? I didn’t know that! I just wanted to run because that’s what _Rei-chan_ does.”

Rei choked a little bit and spat on the ground as he ran. Once again, Nagisa was startled and excited by how unkempt Rei became when he was running. “You’ve got to stop saying things like that, Nagisa-kun.”

“Things like what?”

“Things like… like _flirty_ things,” Rei replied. He seemed overwhelmed, per usual.

Nagisa tilted his head to the side, trying to figure out what was so wrong with being flirty. “But… But, Rei-chan, we’re matched. We’re supposed to be flirty, that’s the point of being engaged. We’re in our puppy love stage or whatever,” Nagisa said, a little surprised. It was true that Nagisa could be downright frisky with everyone he met, but he was exceptionally so with Rei, especially now that they were getting along. After all, they were supposed to live together one day. They were supposed to get married. What were a few flirty comments when one day they’d be sharing kisses and sleeping in the same bed?

“Yeah, but… but, Nagisa. We’re not in _love_. We just got paired, randomly mind you, and now we’re stuck together unless the government decides on a better way of handling our country’s marriage laws.”

Nagisa felt like someone punched him in the stomach. His breathing started to pick up, but he didn’t think it had anything to do with running. “Oh,” was all he could reply.

“Anyways, Nagisa, we’re both _boys_.”

Nagisa choked almost as badly as Rei did. Well that just said it all, didn’t it? Nagisa had known there must have been another reason for Rei to be so standoffish towards him in the beginning of the semester, for Rei to not want a relationship with him. It was because, apparently, Rei was as heterosexual as they came, and he was uninterested in having any kind of romantic association with Nagisa. That was probably why he didn’t want to be seen talking to him in class; he didn’t want anyone to get the wrong idea about where his sexual persuasion lay.

The more Nagisa thought about it, the more things started to make sense. Rei seemed tense when Nagisa touched him because he didn’t want to touch Nagisa for the same reasons. Rei didn’t want to share a bed with Nagisa because he didn’t want to sleep with Nagisa in the way Nagisa wanted to sleep with Rei. Rei said their marriage would only be useful for financial reasons because he had no plans in developing a homosexual relationship with Nagisa.

Jesus, the reason Rei blushed so much was probably because he was embarrassed _for_ him. He was always over-complimenting Rei and making it obvious just how taken he had become with the other boy. Nagisa had been making an idiot of himself, and he had never so much as noticed.

“Rei-chan, I think I feel sick,” Nagisa blurted out. He couldn’t even find the will to respond to Rei’s comment.

Rei stopped running and made Nagisa come to a halt with him. “Are you okay? Do you think you’re going to throw up?”

“Maybe,” Nagisa said honestly. “I think I’m just going to catch the train. I’ll try running with you tomorrow if I feel better, okay?” he asked, already walking back to the train station.

Rei fell into step alongside him, his long strides matching up with every two or three of Nagisa’s. “That sounds like a good idea. I’ll come with you.”

“No!” Nagisa yelped. He flushed bright red. “No, I mean, I don’t want to get in the way of your run, okay? Why don’t you just go on ahead? I’ll talk to you –or, see you, I guess- in class.”

Rei frowned. “… Sure,” he agreed eventually. “Take care.” With that, Rei spun on his heel and started back towards school. Nagisa walked miserably to the train station, pulling at his hair a little bit. Just when things finally started to go right, everything somehow got worse.

* * *

Nagisa would have loved the opportunity to talk to Makoto and Haru in private about what had happened that morning with Rei, but he never got the chance.

It was an absolute shame, too, because Nagisa never wanted to talk about his problems. But he really needed some advice, and the way that their joint practice with Samezuka had been arranged left no time for Nagisa to ask his questions. Instead of having a bit of time to lag behind with Makoto or Haru in the locker room, they had to rush to catch a train to Samezuka Academy.

“Hazuki-san! Wanna race again today? I won’t lose!” Ai exclaimed with a surprising amount of confidence.

Nagisa toed at the pool deck, feeling a little less chipper than usual. “We’ll see about that,” he said weakly, trying not to look upset and failing miserably.

Sometimes when things went as wrong as they did this morning, Nagisa got caught up in his own self-loathing. Today was no exception. Rei wasn’t gay, which meant he would never love Nagisa in the way Nagisa had thought his fiancé would love him. He would never be a proper husband. And as Nagisa thought about those things, he couldn’t help but think about how fitting that was, how unlovable he was.

His parents’ words echoed loudly in his head. He felt loud and stupid and annoying. He felt like swimming was pointless, it would never get him anywhere. He even felt fat in his jammers because it was only a matter of time before all that strawberry shortcake caught up with him and he was bulging out of his swimsuit.

Momo squinted at him. “Hey, you look funny. Are you feeling okay?”

Nagisa’s eyes widened, and he shied away from the other first year. “Yeah, I’m all right,” he answered. He took a deep breath. “Let’s race now, Ai-chan. And Momo, you can join if you feel like getting third place in a breast 100 meters,” he teased.

The slight bit of trash talk was enough to make the other two boys stop staring at him critically. Apparently Nagisa had lost his touch because more and more people were beginning to see when he was upset. Either he was becoming worse at hiding things or his problems were becoming too difficult to stuff away.

Ai-chan raced considerably better than their last race, but Nagisa still beat him. He had been practicing with paddles, flippers, power racks, and pull buoys for the past few weeks. He’d been so excited about getting closer with Rei that his energy had skyrocketed. He was stronger than ever.

But now his heart felt weak.

“Hazuki, Rin’s freaking out about you over there,” Sousuke said, sneaking up behind Nagisa and scaring the living crap out of him.

“Holy _crap_ , Sousuke, don’t startle me like that!” Nagisa whined, as fussy and as loud as ever. He frowned. “And what is this, stress out about Nagisa day? I feel fine. I’m in a really _good_ mood, actually, I’ve been waiting for this joint practice for months!” Even as he spoke, however, Nagisa’s body shrunk inwards. He’d never felt so out of place or insecure among his friends before. His shoulders hunched in towards each other and he crossed his arms over his stomach. It was taking all he had to not start crying right there on the pool deck.

Sousuke was clearly unimpressed by Nagisa’s response. “Look, you don’t have to tell me what’s going on, but Rin is upset, and I won’t stand for that,” he said, folding his arms over his chest to make his muscles look bigger. Nagisa huffed out a sigh.

“You’re a nuisance, and nothing is going on,” he promised. He climbed back up on the block to avoid any further conversation with Sousuke. He was vaguely conscious of Haru getting ready to dive with Seijuro on his other side. This was a freestyle race, then.

Nagisa jumped in with the buzzer, if only to avoid talking to Sousuke for a single second longer. The more he thought about how uncomfortable the conversation had been, the faster his arms rotated and his legs kicked. He’d do anything just to get _away_.

He was burning himself out in the first leg of the race, but he didn’t care. Nagisa’s swimming had always been based on gut feeling, not mechanics. Right now he felt scared. He felt scared enough that he had to exhaust himself to get away from what was troubling him, almost like how Makoto used to swim.

Except he was still Nagisa, and his arms still extended further and further the more he swam. He kept pushing harder, and harder, and harder, until without warning, his hand smacked down on the filter surrounding the pool.

“Ouch,” Nagisa hissed, holding his fingers as he emerged from the water, his chest heaving. He had been so focused on swimming that he had forgotten to watch for the end of the pool. If he had been in the Iwatobi short course, that would have been fine, but here at Samezuka’s long course, he hadn’t paced himself correctly.

Nagisa looked up and noticed his friends all staring at him. He shrunk under their gaze, not sure why they were all looking at him like he was growing gills.

“No need to worry, guys. I just hit my hand,” he promised.

“No, Nagisa…” Makoto said, his eyes glancing between Nagisa in one lane and Haru in the next. “You just beat Haru.”

Nagisa’s eyes widened. “Haru-chan?” he asked, unable to believe it.

He was looking at Haru, but Rin answered instead. “You beat Haru at 50 meters. I haven’t been able to do that since the Iwatobi Swim Club was still standing,” he mused.

Haru’s striking blue eyes barred through Nagisa. Haru was mad. Not because Nagisa had won, but because Nagisa was keeping secrets. Haru was only ever truly mad with Nagisa when he tried to keep his feelings locked away like this. For someone who seemed so apathetic, Haru cared about Nagisa more than anyone else in his life. Even in elementary school, Haru had shown a soft spot for him. Nagisa wasn’t Makoto, he wasn’t Haru’s fiancé, but he still mattered to him, and that’s what counted.

Before Haru could actually burn a hole in Nagisa’s head with his laser vision, much less speak, a familiar ringtone resounded throughout the pool. Nagisa shut up his eyes and scratched the back of his neck sheepishly, trying to seem unbothered. “Whoops, I think that’s me!” Nagisa climbed out of the pool and rushed to get his phone. Never before had he been so happy to answer a call.

* * *

Nagisa probably should have thought more about who could be calling him.

He didn’t know who he expected to be on the other side of the line, but he should have figured it would be one of his parents. After all, his closest friends were currently in the same room as him. Nagisa winced when he saw the caller ID and took a seat on the bench, knowing he wouldn’t be able to stand up for this one.

He could feel his teammates eyes still on him from the other side of the pool. Now wasn’t the time to have a break down, but Nagisa was pretty sure that was about to happen. He had put himself through too much today to deal with a phone call form either of his parents.

He flipped open the phone. But as he did so, his wet hands made it slippery and his cell clattered to the floor, somehow turning on the speakerphone as it cracked against the tile.

_“Hazuki Nagisa, what is the meaning of this failed quiz I found in the trash? What happened to studying? We did not send you to an elite middle school just to make you stupider! How can a son of mine be dumb enough to fail at simple algebr-“_

Nagisa quick picked up the phone and pressed it to his ear. He felt his cheeks heat up bright red as even more heads turned to look at him. This had undoubtedly been the most embarrassing day of his life.

Nagisa ripped off his swim cap and hid his face behind it, tears brimming in his eyes. Because, of course, what he really needed right now was to hurt his hand in front of the whole Samezuka team, get yelled at by his father in front of the whole Samezuka team, and then cry –you guessed it- in front of the whole Samezuka team. He took a shaky breath, debating whether to run away or drown himself in the pool.

Everything felt like it was slipping. It was too much in one day for Nagisa. It was too much for one year. He finally understood why the government thought he needed a partner to keep him less stressed because this going through high school alone business was nearly unbearable.

Nagisa squeaked, rather than sobbed, and quickly ran out of the pool before anyone could question his crying. He rushed out through the locker rooms, into the halls, and out of the building, all while keeping the phone pressed to his ear and listening to his father scream at him. Nagisa was such a failure; he was such a _failure._

A hand grabbed at the back of his shirt. “Nagisa-kun!”

Nagisa nearly tumbled into the grass, but he managed to keep his balance. Before he could properly identify his attacker as Rei, the other boy grabbed his phone and listened to his father speak for a couple seconds. Rei nodded knowingly before hitting the end call button. “Rei-chan, you can’t just-“

“So both of your parents yell at you?” Rei asked, not mincing words. Nagisa flinched, his shoulders once again curling inwards.

“Makoto says they’re verbally abusive.”

Rei didn’t respond to that for a moment. Nagisa shuffled his feet aimlessly, not sure what to do. Every muscle in his body screamed for a hug, but he didn’t want to ask for that when he knew Rei wasn’t interested in him romantically. Even if a hug was purely platonic, Nagisa was still too embarrassed from all the other ways he had latched onto Rei to ever properly hug him again.

“It’s okay. Parents should be tough on their kids,” Nagisa said dismissively when Rei took too long to answer.

“Not like that,” Rei disagreed. The taller boy sat down on the grass. He gestured for Nagisa to join him. Once again, Rei was quiet for an almost embarrassingly long time. “You know, that kind of thing can really affect you. I used to… I used to get bullied a lot in middle school, and it’s made me feel so _awkward_ talking to people. I mean, surely you’ve noticed how overwhelmed I get, and like you said, I act so paranoid.” Rei placed a hand on Nagisa’s shoulder. “But you’re so confident. I’m envious that you can be torn down so often but still stand right back up. It’s a beautiful thing,” Rei promised.

Nagisa sniffled. The tears hadn’t stopped yet, and he doubted they would stop any time soon. “I’m really not that confident,” he promised, swiping uselessly at his tears. “I’m really not, I’m… I’m such a mess, I just…”

“Hey, hey… don’t worry about it,” Rei cooed, cupping his face like he had done for Nagisa that day on the train. Nagisa whimpered as the other boy thumbed away a couple tears. Why was it that Rei seemed to be strongest when Nagisa was at his weakest? “It’s hard to feel good about yourself when other people are saying such cruel things about you.”

Nagisa wiped his nose on the back of his arm. He’d never felt this ugly in front of Rei before. Snot and tears were decidedly not beautiful. “What did… what did your bullies say about you? Did they say stuff like my mom and dad say?”

“I dunno… Mostly they made fun of me for being gay.”

Nagisa’s blood ran cold. “What?”

“I… I suppose I should have mentioned it earlier. I know you’re straight, Nagisa-kun, so I didn’t want to make you feel pressured by bringing it up so early in our relationship, but I’m classically categorized as homosexual. Unfortunately, the tough kids at my old school found that funny and frequently made fun of me for my sexual preferences,” Rei explained, looking awkward.

Nagisa stared up at Rei, amazed. “Rei-chan… What in the _world_ made you think I was _straight?_ ” he asked because, of course, _that’s_ the thing that Nagisa was hung up on.

Rei looked confused as he thought about the question. “Well, um… I don’t know, I just-“

“All of my friends are gay.”

“Well-“

“I talked about sharing a bed with you.”

“Yes, but-“

“Even _you_ said I was ridiculously flirty with you.”

“Right, and, well-“

“Rei-chan, you have _got_ to stop assuming things about me because you always get it _wrong_ ,” Nagisa admonished before throwing himself at Rei. His shoulders shook both with depressed sobs from his father’s call and with happiness as he pressed his lips against Rei’s.

When he pulled away, Rei’s glasses were askew and his hair was ruffled. “You’re right. Assuming doesn’t get us anywhere,” Rei agreed. “Except, well…”

“What?”

“Would it be wrong to _assume_ you wanted another kiss?” Rei asked, looking up at Nagisa hopefully. A bright smile emerged over Nagisa’s face.

“I thought you’d never ask.”

* * *

“So things are going better?” Makoto asked a few days later as he and Nagisa waited for their respective partners to come out of the locker room.

Nagisa nodded hastily. Everything had become much better after Nagisa and Rei had sorted through all of their miscommunications. Apparently, Rei was so timid that he thought Nagisa was teasing him all this time with the flirty comments and the excessive touching. However, he had quickly developed feelings for Nagisa, considering how cute he was. Rei admitted that he had been so flustered by how adorable Nagisa was, that he wasn’t able to say his own name on stage at the engagement ceremony.

Rei had also explained that he let Nagisa fall asleep on him for these reasons. He liked seeing Nagisa still and resting against him on the train ride home. However, he didn’t like kids from school seeing them together in case the bullying picked back up. It always stressed him when Nagisa sat on his desk and pestered him about swimming because he worried about attracting more homophobic bullies.

Nagisa finally understood, and fortunately, Rei understood, too. Now that they had worked through all their problems and determined their feelings, it was all Nagisa could do to stay off of Rei. He was kissing him and asking for piggybacks nearly twenty-four seven now. It was clear that Rei was exhausted by it, but it was also obvious that he was enjoying every second.

Nagisa smiled up at Makoto.

“Things are going perfect!”

**Author's Note:**

> I had some inspiration for this short story, so here are the links! 
> 
> Makoto in glasses:  
> http://data.whicdn.com/images/138636110/large.jpg
> 
> Makoto, Haru, and Nagisa all chilling on Makoto's bed:  
> https://41.media.tumblr.com/0b5012f89d1b3df522f507dc529bcf3d/tumblr_ne6e5bOBFn1srnsdlo1_500.jpg
> 
> Nagisa laughing at Rei's pants:  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wUGG4sv2P70
> 
> Once again, I hope there were no glaring errors whether grammatical or cultural! I meant for this fic to be two thousand words, but somehow I ended up with 20k. And the only thing more tedious than writing 20k is EDITING 20k, so I apologize for any mistakes! I hope you enjoyed!


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